HIDDEN DESIRES

 
 

By Carol Sandford

 
 

Chapter 05

 
 

It was more than Deanna could bare when she careered into Will and Rosalind outside his quarters the following day. If there had been one time when she'd wished their quarters weren't next door to each other, it was now as it was just to painful to watch him disappearing into his room with or without a woman.

She was jealous if he was with one, and she was jealous if he wasn't, because she wanted to be in there with him and she never was, except when talking about ship business. It just wasn't the same.

And it was jealousy, Deanna understood the emotion clearly now. Something had happened. Something had changed. Something had reminded her of her commitment to Will, her bond, her attraction and her reason for being on board the Enterprise.

They were all because of Will and it had taken a long time for her to appreciate and understand it. She was here for Will and she had lost him to another woman and she had pushed him there. His thoughts were sensual, and his dreams were erotic. His days were filled with Ros and not her, and she missed him so much that she almost couldn't bare to see him anymore.

Until the day when Will sought her out.

He found her in the arboretum at the same place that they had had their fateful conversation just a few days ago. It seemed a life time ago and a lot had happened since, especially for Deanna.

Will had realised Deanna's feelings towards him had changed. It had been a long time coming and he was ready for it. In truth he'd been ready for a long time. But this time it had been Deanna holding back. It was Deanna that needed the shock treatment. Will hated doing it, but desperate times needed desperate measures, and Will was desperate.

He wanted Deanna back, he'd decided that a long time ago. It hadn't been a sudden decision, but something that had slowly crept up on him over the past months. He had sat back and watched Deanna try and try again to establish relationships with other people, other men, but had continuously failed.

But with each new relationship, Deanna was changing. She had begun by looking just a good time and not a permanent liaison. Even Will knew what kind of reputation the woman he loved was going to end up with if she continued with this line of seduction.

Will knew it wasn't what Deanna truly wanted, not really. She was settling for second best, but even that wasn't enough. Deanna needed love, pure and simple.

What hurt Will most was that he was there, with enough love for both of them, but how did he tell her? How in the world did he change what they had into something more?

And Will wanted more. He wanted it all. He wanted Deanna.

It had taken a lot to get here, this point, and put his heart on his sleeve. But Will couldn't stand seeing the woman he loved in so much pain, especially when he could be the one with the solution. He stood behind her watching her solitary form, oozing despair. It hung around her like a shroud.

It was time.

His words were low, but very strong, "I made her up."

He watched her outline stiffen as her tension increased tenfold. Will didn't' stop. "There is no such person as Ros, it was just a name I thought up. I was trying to make you jealous, but I only caused you pain. I'm sorry for that, Deanna."

The silence hung between them as Will's words told their own story. Will tried again. "You had Simon, and I...I wanted you, Deanna, I've wanted you for a long time, but I didn't want to spoil your happiness. I wanted you to have a good time with Simon, God knows you deserved that. I wanted you to think I was happy with someone else, but I wasn't."

Will slowly moved to stand beside her, their eyes meeting as she digested his news. He could see her milling over his revelation, clearly not quite comprehending what had happened over the past couple of days. Will put her out of her misery.

"There never was a Ros, she was just someone I made up to hide my true feelings for you." Will slid down to the seat beside her and took her chilled fingers within his. "Her name was Theresa, she's the sister of ensign Jameson. She was only here for a short visit. That's why she wasn't registered to the crew, Deanna."

On hearing her name, Deanna finally came out of her stupor, her brow furrowed with a million questions, "But...but I saw you kissing her. I saw you laughing and dancing with her. She was 'not' a figment of my imagination, Will."

Will laughed tenderly as he pulled Deanna's tense body to his, his laughter ruffling the curls on the top of her head, "Oh my love, Theresa is a woman, just like you. She could see what you were trying to do; your little ploy to make her jealous. But even she could see that it was I who was jealous. She saw the way that I looked at you and decided to turn the tables and be the one to make 'you' the jealous one."

Will lifted her chin and looked deeply into her eyes, his smile was gentle and teasing, but oh, so very sincere, "It worked, didn't it, Imzadi?"

Their lips touched and released the torrent of pent up emotion that engulfed them both. They kissed like they have never kissed before. It was a kiss like no othet. The kiss was full of love, of promises, of desire and contentment.

The circle was complete, they were together again, only this time it was forever.

 
     
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