By Carol Sandford


Chapter 01


Our choice to be only friends was the third unhappiest day of my life. The first was the loss of my beloved mother so many years ago now, that the face that I once remembered and cherished, is beginning to drift away with time. It was so long ago, so very, very long ago.

The second was walking away from you the first time, a painful memory that haunts me as though it were only yesterday that it happened. It still hurts me even now almost as much as I know that it still hurts you. I hurt you, Deanna, I know that, but I did hurt me, too.

The third was the final time I walked away from you, the day when we said that we were going to be friends and nothing more. The third unhappiest day, and the stupidest. It was only a few months ago but it feels like a lifetime. I can't believe I agreed with you. I can't believe I'm letting you go, again, especially when my feelings are as strong as when I first fell in love with you.

I can look at you and feel my insides glow, purely on the strength of your smile. It has the power to warm my heart and sear my soul. And that voice; that wonderful lilting, calming and sultry sound that takes my breath away as it pours over my fragile and eagerly wanting and waiting senses. It still sends shivers of desire through me.

I still crave your touch; to feel your breath whisper across my skin, your fingertips trickling unspoken words upon secret places that only you will ever know, and it drives me crazy that I can't have that anymore. That I can't have you.

I want your lips upon mine, I want your tongue dancing with mine, I want your body crashing against mine, like the waves meeting the shore; unstoppable as they desperately, constantly reach for release, feeling right. Just so, so right.

But even though I see the same desires, wants and needs in your eyes, Deanna, I can never tell you what you must not hear, nor let my soul reveal what you must not see. You must never know, that, like a thief, you creep into my dreams every night and love me. Nor must never know that you steal my thoughts almost every minute of the day.

But you do know that you stole my heart when you slipped into my soul, and you're more than welcome to keep it for a day when we can be more than friends again. And when that happens, Deanna, that day will become the happiest one of my life.

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